3 ways to joyfully say goodbye to summer

It’s September – can you believe it?! I feel like fall crept up on me this year. It’s my favorite season but it’s hard saying goodbye to summer this time. Something shifted in the past month and I’ve felt more energetic and awake than I have since becoming pregnant two years ago. I feel like myself again. I’ve missed this. 

There are a whole slew of reasons I’m feeling so good, and I know they won’t stop with the onset of fall. Vitamins and fish oil pills, my daughter finally sleeps through the night, I’ve probably doubled my intake of vegetables, and I’m running for longer and longer stretches. (Don’t get me wrong – this means I can go up to a mile now without a break. We’re not talking marathon runner here, but hey, I’m feeling awesome!).

Maybe this all boils down to that old theme of resisting change. And in this case, it’s the weather: resistance is futile. There’s this new blogger out there in the world named Ingrid Fetell Lee who spreads the idea that, “our greatest source of joy is the world around us.” Her monthly joyletter (aka newsletter) is seriously inspiring. And in honor of this idea that joy is all around us, I’ve dug up some ideas that will prompt some creative activities that honor the transition into this season that is as full of abundance as it is beautiful. It might sound a bit rambunctious, but we really can joyfully say goodbye to summer.

Celebratory Fall Planting

Make this a just-mom project or loop the kids in:

  • Make a fall outdoor planter for your porch or balcony. Fill it with textures and colors that make you smile. For a little inspiration, check out this post by Pam Kessler in House of Hawthornes.
  • Plant bulbs for next spring – tulips, daffodils, hyacinths, and irises are great options. The DIY gardener has some other pro fall-gardening tips for your list. 
  • There are tons of vegetables that thrive in a fall garden – chard, kale, broccoli, beans, the list goes on….Jill Winger at The Prairie Homestead can get you started with her detailed descriptions for what to plant and how to keep each vegetable happy. 

Artsy fall projects

There are a million fall craft ideas out there and I can say that usually I have more ideas than a single human can handle. I maybe get to one or two. So with that in mind, here are some super easy and fast fall projects that we busy mamas can probably squeeze in! 

  • For some fun with the kids, Frugal Mom eh! Suggests we try these pumpkin apple stamps. A halved apple is the stamper – using orange paint it makes a pumpkin shape on the paper. Paint in a stem and leaves and wolla, pumpkins abound! 
  • 10 Minute DIY Pumpkin Soap looks like a lot of fun. Heck, you could invite some other moms over and make it a hang out session! Heidi Kundin at Happiness is Homemade has the instructions. 
  • Make a wreath for your door. Personally, I just rummage through thrift stores for cast off wreath bases and fake flowers. Then I tie ‘em on with some ribbon or twine and wolla! 10 minutes and Done. But if you want something a little more fine-tuned, these are some beautiful and affordable ideas from the Prudent Penny Pincher.

Get out of the house

If there are any trips you’ve been wanting to do but haven’t, now is a great time to plan them! We’re squeezing in some late season camping over here in Wisconsin, hitting up those last farmers markets, and keeping our ears open for word of the area’s best pumpkin patches. I do love fall. Ahhh, yesssss…..

***I’m curious, what are your favorite parts of transitioning to the fall? How do you say goodbye to summer? What are your traditions, and what new things are you thinking about doing this year? Do share a comment. May our lovin’ energy inspire and lift each other up. go mama!

Pro Tips to Turbocharge Dinner

What do you love most about your evenings? If you’ve had a day at the office, are you getting some sweet time with your kiddos and/or getting dinner on the table? If you’re a stay at home mama, do you get a much needed break? Whatever your situation, I bet you are the heroine who gets at least half the dinner meals on the table each week. I bet you’d also love some pro tips to turbocharge dinner.

I enjoy cookin’ dinner. After working at a computer all day, it feels so good to feast my eyes on colorful vegetables and immerse my hands in interesting textures as I chop, rinse, and stir. But I’ll tell ya one thing – I do not love how long it takes to cook! Love doing it, but wish it could go faster. 

For today’s blog, I’ve done some scouring of the internet to bring you pro tips to turbocharge dinner. In other words – it’s time cooking dinner went faster! I’ll share a few of their ideas here and also give you links to the full articles. You should also check out this earlier post with 5 essential time saving tips for your kitchen.

Straight from the pros: turbocharge dinner

Sarah Crow at Eat This, Not That! recommends that we: 

  • Use “mise en place,” which is a french term that means “to put in place.” In other words, get everything ready, chopped, and prepped before you start cooking. Your meal will turn out better and feel less chaotic as it’s prepared.
  • Get some kitchen shears to make cutting faster
  • Make one-pan meals that roast meat and veggies together

In a bon appetite article with a sweetly playful voice, Christina Chaey suggests we:

  • Stock up on ingredients that feel fancy, but are super easy to cook. Ground lamb, anyone?
  • Consider the freezer our best friends. Use it for leftovers, for extra bags of tomato sauce, for extra bags of pre-prepped fresh herbs, for pre-sliced fancy bread that you can throw in the toaster. You get the idea. 
  • Cook grains in extra-large batches. The leftovers will inspire other meals during the week, and the grain part’s already done!

Taylor Isaac at CookSmarts has our backs with an article that talks about saving kitchen time on the cooking and cleaning side:

  • Keep a trash bowl or trash can near you. We waste precious time going back and forth to a trash can!
  • Prep dry ingredients first. This lets you re-use your measuring cups and spoons without washing in-between. 
  • Batch prepping = batch cleanup. (Notice a batch theme across these authors?!)  Batching makes meals big enough for leftovers, and means you’ll have less dishes to wash on those leftover nights. 

Let’s do this!!!

Well, there you have it! Straight from experts who have shortened their cooking time. I’m going to be intentional about employing some of these points in my own home, especially the “mise en place,” – aka prepping before starting to cook. We’ll see how it goes!

***I’m curious, what are your go-to tricks for making dinner quickly? What’s your turbocharge dinner secret? Make sure to write it in the comment box! Give this go mama community some inspiration – after all, we could all use a little more time in our lives! go mama!

How to say “no” with class

Hey there! We may have never met, but let me tell you something I know about you: you’re a class act. You probably show up every day determined to do your all, and let me tell you – whether you know it or not – it’s working.

Speaking of doing our all, that sometimes mean we let the things we most want to do slip to the wayside because we take on a lot. Saying no can be really hard to do – especially for women. We grow up being taught the importance of pleasing other people and it creates invisible chains on our time. Then, we become moms, and our time is precious in a way it never was before. But saying no?!? It’s hard!

Today, let’s talk about how to say “no” gently and well. In other words – learn how to say “no” with class! We can say no in ways that don’t hurt feelings and that honor ourselves and our needs. We can say no so that we make space to all the things we care most about. 

Three Ways to Say No with Class

Here are some suggestions that you can riff off of. I’ll follow up with an explanation of why they’re good!

  • “I’m flattered that you asked me. However, it won’t be possible for me to help out with X.” 
  • “Oh, that [insert activity] sounds wonderful. I’ve been feeling spread thin lately with everything going on and need to take a pass. I hope it goes really well and I’ll be thinking of you!”
  • “You know I value our friendship/this cause. Unfortunately, I can’t be there. As a rule, we keep Sunday afternoons for our immediate family to spend time together and get ready for the week.”

(More examples for saying “no,” can be found at this blog post by Marie Forleo. Her focus is primarily the business world, but the basic concepts still apply). Using her advice, we can see that all of the above points are great examples because they:

-preserve the dignity of the other person

-are kind

-are honest

-allow you to set your boundaries without apologizing for them, and

-don’t leave an opening for the person to push back

If for some reason the person does push back, take a firm stance and remember that you are a kind and loving person and it’s going to be okay. Say, “I’d rather not,” or, “I’m not able to, but thanks again for thinking of me.”

Remember Your Body Language

While you’re at it, keep in mind that your body language and tone are speaking even louder than your words! Keep your shoulders down and stand confidently. Make your voice drop at the end of a sentence instead of letting it rise. This keeps your statement a statement instead of some sort of iffy question that someone will try to poke holes through. 

Last – don’t for a second feel guilty about honoring yourself and your life and your needs. After all, in the end, whoever you are talking to also wants you to live your best life. You’re a class act. You do you!

***I’m curious, what activities in your life are you ready to say no to? And how will you say it next time the opportunity comes up? Tell me about it in the comment section. May our lovin’ energy inspire and lift each other up!  go mama!

A love letter from your future self

To speak from the heart can be a hard thing. To speak truth to yourself from your own heart can be even harder. Today, the truth that I am wrestling with is about how beautiful this life is with and in many cases because of the things that I call mistakes. I bet you can probably relate. We are hard on ourselves and yet, if we step back for a moment, we can see that this thing we’ve made is so incredibly beautiful. In fact, if the future could speak, your future self would write you a love letter. Today, I invite you to listen to your future self – give yourself a whole lot of appreciation for everything you are and for exactly where you are. Your path led you here, and none of it was wrong.

A love letter from my future self

The habit of beating ourselves up over past mistakes – which includes the pain of reliving them – it’s a real joysucker, am I right? I’ve been thinking about that lately as my husband and I begin to renovate our upstairs. We moved in a year ago and have been living on only the first floor, as the upstairs was gross and honestly not livable. The current regret is that I didn’t invest in Bitcoin when I learned about it. Affording this renovation would be sooo much easier with that investment cash. 

What was I so afraid of? I’ll tell you what: I was afraid that I would hurt my future self by spending money now. And I’ll tell you something else. If I’d been wise enough to ask her, my future self would have shouted a love letter from the rooftops, “Everything is great over here! I’ve got this life thing covered and you’re going to be FINE! You do you!”

If I’d been wise enough to ask her, my future self would have shouted a love letter from the rooftops, “Everything is great over here! I’ve got this life thing covered and you’re going to be FINE! You do you!”

Ashley Fisher, gomama.love blogger

My dear friend, your future self is every bit as confident and thrilled with her life. Your future self is in love with you and all the mistakes you’ve made and the life you have and will have because of them.

Buy the latte

There’s this new investment company out there that markets to women – it’s called Ellevest. I’m not yet a client of theirs but I saw a photo of theirs on Twitter that I just loved. It stuck with me. Sort of a future-self shoutout, if you will. It was a photo of a travel coffee mug and it said, “Buy the f***in’ latte.”

Their point is that women are told all sorts of things about how to be wise with money that is actually gendered and can be disempowering. Among them, “don’t buy coffee and you will save so much money.” I’m not a financial expert, but I love this idea they presented. We are 100% capable of taking care of ourselves even in areas where we may have been unconsciously taught otherwise. We can be as brave and daring and bold with money or anything else as we want to be. So buy the latte. Future you is going to be just fine, and present you could use that little joy moment. 

We carry our mothers with us

I have strong memories of asking my mom for a $1 burger on our way to or from the big city that had the amenities our small town lacked. When she said yes, it was a big deal. Usually, she wasn’t interested in shelling out what I considered small amounts of cash to feed our ever-ravenous teenage bellies. I was so angry that she wouldn’t pay a dollar when I was so hungry. 

Now, to be clear, I am blessed to have been well fed through my childhood. These are first world complaints I’m sharing. But they have a point:

I want my daughter to grow up believing that everything in the future is going to be ok. She does not need to spend her life afraid of not being able to get by someday if she spends money on herself in the present. How I feel about money, talk about money, and think about money will inevitably filter down to her. She will do one of two things: she will pick some of it up, or she will throw it to the wind because it doesn’t resonate with the truth she was born knowing. That truth is that everything is going to be wonderful in the end. 

What to do?

So now what? I’ve labeled the problem: my worry over the future, as evident by beating myself up over past mistakes. And I’ve labeled a secondary problem: my relationship with money is my mother’s relationship with money. I picked up on my mother’s preference to avoid spending money on small delights, much to my chagrin. So for my daughter, and for myself, and perhaps even for my mother, I must change. 

Change takes time, but I do love the fact that it is possible. For me, this means getting financially savvy (through the wisdom of women such as Suze Orman and Elizabeth Warren), starting to invest, and an allowance for just-because purchases. While this blog post has focused on my trust in the future and my relationship with money, the concept applies to anything. Trust in the future and our relationship with our children, our spouses, our work, our play, our dreams.

Remember the love letter

Today, let’s give ourselves a free pass. This is your permission slip to thank yourself for past mistakes next time you start reliving something and beating yourself up about it. Remember that your future self has written you a love letter for your mistakes. You deserve a little self-kindness, and you deserve the amazing things ahead because of what you learned by those mistakes. You are kind, you are smart, and you are a powerful creator. You are an amazing mom and friend and a light to those blessed by your love. 

I’m curious – what new adventure are you ready to start, now that we’re sure we’re in the right place and we’ve made the right choices? Tell me about it in the comments. I’d love to know what you’re conjuring up. My our loving energy inspire and lift each other up. go mama!

3 questions to make family gatherings 10x better

Hey you! You’re a great mom, you know that? Whatever you’ve done or haven’t done so far today, it’s just the right amount. Give yourself a big hug and some personal encouragement because today and every day, you are giving your all. Speaking of giving your all – it’s hard to do that and catch back up with yourself sometimes, especially when it comes to self care at family gatherings.

Am I right?!! No matter how quirky or dramatic or smooth sailing your family may be, I bet you can relate when I say that wonderful wonderful wonderful as family gatherings are, they often leave me feeling tired and drained by the end of day 2 or 3! Good news is there are things we can do to prevent that fatigue.

There’s this quote – maybe you’ve heard it – that if you don’t plan, you plan to fail. Today I invite you to plan for your own self care during the chaotic hubbub of communal or family gatherings. Especially since these things are supposed to be fun!!

I cracked a family gathering self care strategy

As I write this blog post, I can tell you that I cracked a strategy and I’m walking the talk. I’m in the midst of a family reunion. This trip, I planned for my own care ahead of time and I can report that so far, this plan has made me feel so much more present and happy during these precious days together. While I could not presume that what works for me will work for you, I’ll share any way in case it inspires your own course, whatever that may be.

My family gathering self-care items:

1. I will go to bed at 10:00. I commit to excusing myself from conversation or games so that I will be rested for the next day.

2. I commit to going for a run after my daughter is put to bed.

3. I will set my intentions and energetic boundaries for the day before leaving the bedroom (I’m an empath, so setting energetic boundaries is huge!)

4. I will write a couple of blog posts.

5. I will make space to start and enjoy a new book.

I can’t tell you how much better I felt as I packed for this trip, knowing exactly how I would preserve my energy over the next several days. I want to show up with people as my full self, and I firmly believe that I can only do that if I first attend to my own self-care.

Your turn

You, dear reader, are a light in this world and a great mom. You are worth every bit of self care that you can muster. Remember that today and all days, there is space for your self care.

Are you committed now to making family gatherings more fun for yourself? Here are three questions to help you plan a self care strategy of your own.

1. What do you want to make sure you do for yourself over the course of the gathering? (Important: it can be more than one thing)

2. When are you going to do this activity?

3. Is the time you do this thing negotiable? If yes, what are alternatives that you are also ok with?

***Your turn! I’d love to know – what do you do (or what will you do) for self care while you are at family gatherings? What keeps you grounded and present with those around you?

Picture from Pexels

Your dynamite daughter needs these five skills

I’m about to share some ideas about self image that I think most women need to hear, including myself. I need to hear it over and over until it’s not something I know, but something I do.

But before I share, I want you to know that these ideas are not a reason to be hard on yourself. We only ever do the best we can and if for some reason your life has led you to a place where you experience the self-doubt described below by Paula Stone Williams – or if you have learned to communicate nonverbally in ways that don’t express “strong woman” – it’s not your fault. Your dynamite daughter needs these five skills, and so do you.

How women and girls are taught self-doubt

In the TedTalk by Paula Stone Williams, called “I’ve lived as a man and as a woman, here’s what I learned,” Paula shares a powerful story about how different her experience is as a woman, compared to when she was a man. As a man, she was given respect and trust off-hand. As a woman, she is second-guessed all the time. Most powerfully, she said, “When you are second-guessed all the time, you begin to doubt yourself.”

What woman hasn’t experienced this? An incessant drive to do everything just right, so that you can tell the people who question you that you are sure what you’ve created is correct. So that you won’t feel your self-worth somehow diminished if you are wrong. When did it become a problem to be wrong? Isn’t that how we grow?

I am determined to ask “Are you sure,” as she grows up as little as possible. Maybe that will help. But in the mean time, there are other things I can work on that will also make a powerful difference.

Nonverbal communication is our ticket out

I know my body language is reflective of this learned, unconscious self-doubt. And the scariest thing about this, for me, is that my daughter is going to learn how to move and operate as a woman in this world first from me. What will my body language teach her?

Enter, Sari Di la Mote. Sari is an expert at nonverbal communication, and happens to be most passionate about teaching nonverbal skills to lawyers.

If I was a lawyer, she would have all my money.

Since I can’t benefit from her courses as a lawyer, I’ve done all I can to learn from her through her blog and the free resources she offers. From Sari, I’m learning how to command space. How to own a room. How to show up in my full power.

While there are a lot of things she challenges her students to do, a handful rise to the top. Our dynamite daughters need these five skills, and so do we:

-allow our awareness to fill an entire space before a presentation.
-use open, inviting body language when appropriate, and closed off language for things that aren’t open to conversation.
-take notice of when your voice pulls up at the end of a sentence (evoking uncertainty in a listener), or down (evoking confidence from the listener).
-Influence a tense space by breathing deeply. Become the source of calm in the space.
-She asks you to notice the story you’re telling yourself about a person or situation, and notice how that story influences your body language.

We can set the example

I’ll admit that driven as I am, I could benefit from making it a daily habit to incorporate these lessons. Not just for work presentations, but to the point that it’s second nature to do these things. If not for myself, then for my daughter.

What about you? Do you find yourself in the same boat? You know you show up with your game face on, but your words and body language sometimes sabotage you.

Remember, I’m not sharing all this as another reason to be hard on yourself. All of your experiences have led you to becoming the wonderful, loving, smart human being that you are. This is something worth feeling good about, that we’re here and finally thinking about these things.

Let’s you and me pick one of the bullet points above to work on. Just one. And each morning, set the intent to live that lesson. For example, you might say, “Just for today, I will breathe deeply whenever I feel worried or people around me are tense.” One day at a time, whatever we choose to focus on will be the habit we start to live by. We will become our vision for our daughters.

I’m curious – what bullet point above resonates most with you? What non-verbal skill do you want to work on? Share in the comments below. May our loving energy inspire and lift each other up! go mama!

An intruder made me feel more powerful than I have in years

Remember the last time you had no idea what to do? That thing that in the end made you feel like a baller? Even though you probably haven’t had the exact experience I’m about to share, I’m sure you can relate.

Didn’t see this coming

What have I done? I turn around to look nervously at my upstairs windows before continuing to walk away. It’s 11:30 at night, and one of them is open.

I’ve taken a gamble. Do nothing, and I will have a rotting raccoon corpse somewhere under my second floor floorboards within 30 hours. Open the window, and I will either have two raccoons in my house by morning, or none.

I cross the street to my in-laws house, where my daughter and I have been sleeping for the two nights since we heard the ruckus in our first floor ceiling. My husband is off on a canoe trip. I find myself a single mom for the weekend, unexpectedly camping out at my in-laws house, wondering how the hell to get rid of raccoons on my own before paying an arm and a leg for animal control. My adrenaline is sky high, having been alone with a thirsty, starving raccoon in a dark second floor, nothing but a headlamp to see by and a broom for protection as I open the window.

I pray that the mama raccoon currently pressed against the back windows of my second floor – staring inside with her whole being – I pray she’s smart enough to get her baby and take it away. By now she knows that my home is not safe. Her baby has been locked inside for two days, no food, no water. Why did my husband leave that window open? Who ever heard of raccoons climbing drain pipes?

Can I do this?

Calling the shots on something new can be a great feeling, ya know? To be totally in charge. No possibility of asking someone what they think is the right thing to do. No one to second guess you with a well meaning but patronizing “are you sure?” My husband is gone. Everyone is asleep but the kind neighbor who agreed to sit on her porch to make sure I got out of there ok. It’s all me.

Yeah, I’m going to get this raccoon out of my house.

My gamble paid off. The next morning, the apple piece I left on the window to help mama raccoon get to the right place was gone. That night, no sounds in the floor. No death smells, either, as the days have passed.

Why you’re a baller

I bet you’ve had moments like this. Life shows up in a way you never expected. You aren’t sure how it’s all going to work out until – one step after another – it does. You end up remembering how powerful you are.

A raccoon trapped in my house was one of the more eventful things to have happened in recent weeks. Getting rid of it on my own without the help of my husband or male neighbors (who also weren’t around) made me feel powerful. I would have left it up to them, and I’m so glad it didn’t work out that way. I didn’t realize I was giving away my power by deferring “masculine” activities. I thought I was just allowing things to flow smoothly. Who would’ve thought that an intruder would make me feel so powerful.

What about you? I’d love to hear about an experience where you had to call the shots to solve something you never saw coming. Tell me about how awesome you were. Because you were. Awesome. Leave your story in the comment box! My our energy inspire and cheer each other on. go mama!

5 Essential Time-Saving Tips for Your Kitchen

You know those annoying activities that waste your time but keep happening? A few seconds here, a few there…over and over… it adds up. Ready for a few easy tips?

Today’s five tips are for the kitchen:

  1. What state is your Tupperware drawer in? Think about how much time you spend trying to find the right lid to go with your Tupperware or glassware. Annoying, right? 

-Consider how much Tupperware or glassware you really need and then pare down.

-Gave your lids a home based on shape. I use small baskets- one for circles, one for squares. It works wonders.

-Don’t let Tupperware that needs to be returned to someone land in your drawer. It’s just one more thing to fish around each time you’re in there.

2. Do you have a hell drawer for utensils? It used to take me forever to find the right measuring spoon in my own kitchen hell drawer.

-Give those items that are used once or twice a year a separate home. (I’m lookin’ at you, turkey baster).

-Get rid of things that seemed like a good idea when you got them. Nice then, wasted space now.

-Try to place similar-sized things together. Marie Kondo would even recommend using cardboard boxes to compartmentalize things by size inside the drawer. Can’t say I’ve got as far as the boxes, but it’s a great idea. 

3. Next time a pot scorches, try boiling an inch of water, a dash of dish soap, and 2 Tbsp of baking soda before you start scrubbing. Should come right off. 

4. Keep trash liners at the bottom of your trash can, so they’re right there as soon as you take the dirty trash bag out. A little trick I learned working at a summer camp – works just as well at home!

5. Do you spend time stacking and  restacking things in your pantry, just so it all fits? Or just to remind yourself what’s there? Next time you find yourself doing this: 

-Get rid of (i.e. donate) anything older than 3ish months.

-Set a goal to only buy perishable food for a certain amount of time, during which you will make meals that will use up the non-perishables in your pantry. 

Bonus Tip:

When it comes to food, buy only what you need. I know this is easier said than done, but you can do it.

And remember – one thing at a time!

Remember to take a breath as you think about all the things you could do to make your kitchen waste less of your time. Lists are only a tool. You are capable and amazing and a great mom. You’ll chip at this one thing at a time. You’ll be saving time before you know it.

****I’m curious, what do you do in your kitchen to save time? Reply in the comments below. May our ideas inspire each other to save some precious time! Go mama!

This traveling comedy show for moms is a must-see!

I recently went to the “Pump ‘n “Dump Show,” a comedy act performed by two women who create space to laugh together about the hardships and joys of being a mom. If the Pump ‘n Dump comedy show rolls through your town – go! – it’s a must-see! Shayna Ferm and Tracey Tee had us in tears as we laughed at stories from women in their 60s and 70s, of the terrible parenting moments they had in their pursuit of survival. We laughed at the lies we told ourselves about how life would change with kids. We laughed at some hysterical photo bloopers that were supposed to make you shine on social media but totally failed. I laughed so hard I cried.

I have some photo bloopers of my own. When my baby turned one-month old,  I decided to set her up all pretty for a photo shoot. Epic fail! In fact, none of my month-anniversary photos looked that awesome and I eventually gave up.

But back to the show… my favorite part happened at the very end. Filled with laughter and surrounded by the happy energy of all these women having a hard-earned night out, they asked us turn to the women we came with and tell them that they were wonderful moms.

Talk about some serious validation. These thousand moms were hugging each other and giving the praise that we should seriously be getting every day. There was a lot of love in the room for those few moments and I will carry that with me.

You are an Amazing Mom

Dear reader, dear mama, in case no one has told you yet today, I’m going to tell you:

You are an amazing mom. Thank you for showing up every day for your kids. Thank you for loving them. Thank you for all those moments when you felt like you were breaking but kept going. Thank you for all those times you didn’t know what to do and then figured out what to do.

Thank you for your heart, your light. You are a gift to your kids and a gift to the world.

Keep going.
****In the spirit of validating moms, click on one of the share buttons below. Share to facebook or twitter – or wherever you like to hang out – and tell your mom friends how wonderful and amazing and awesome they are. Link them to this blog so that they can share in the love and validation that is sent to the go mama village every week. Because we all deserve some validation.

You’re a mom. Your ever-changin’ life is beautiful. So honor the changes.

We’ve all heard the quote that two things are certain in life: death and taxes. But do you know about the third?

Change. And everyone resists change.

Today I invite you to embrace any resistance to change that you’re feeling. It’s totally normal and you’re not alone. And by the way, you’re also a great mom. Your ever-changin’ life is beautiful.

Today I invite you to embrace any resistance to change that you’re feeling. It’s totally normal and you’re not alone. And by the way, you’re also a great mom. Your ever-changin’ life is beautiful.

Ashley Fisher, gomama.love blogger

Have you ever heard of Change Management? It’s this concept in the business world that (here’s a shocker) people are people, and they bring their full selves to work, emotions and all. And when you spring big changes on them, they resist and go through a process of adjusting to a new normal. If you want a smooth transition, you have to create space for your employees to honor and mourn what’s being lost, even as you welcome what’s new.

This idea is just as important for family life. You don’t have to just grin and bear it when changes happen. You don’t have to get over it or get used to it. Instead, make space for what you’re feeling – find a way to celebrate or honor what you’re leaving behind. It’s a part of self-care and it’s huge.

The change in my life this month

My little girl has started saying “no.” For some reason, I thought that happened closer to 2 years old. And as my ever-independent and stubborn child begins this path in asserting her space verbally, I find myself resisting. Because “no” in my mind has equated to not being the center of her world much longer. How I’ve resisted being that center, missing all that free time and movement I used to have. And yet here I am, wishing it would stay a little longer. I’m going to become the Mom on Mama Mia, watching her daughter get ready for her wedding and wishing she could stop time.

Ok – that’s at least 23 years away, so this is a bit dramatic. But in my mind’s eye, I can feel that it will always be this way. Loving her where she’s at, missing where we were, and looking forward to all that’s ahead for her and our family. Here I am, resisting this change and all the ones to follow.

When my daughter was born, I left behind long hours spent with my husband, often cooking meals and then talking while he lay on the dining room floor, too full to sit in the chair any longer. I left behind the ability to spontaneously leave the house to go for a run or to see a show. And now, I am leaving behind this short year with my daughter as a baby, proudly toting her around and beaming with every compliment directed at her. Enjoying picking out her outfits and the satisfaction of a new superpower: forced sleep by nursing. I’m leaving behind the baby-style conversations we had, her babbling on and on to my encouraging “You’ve got a good point. Tell me more.” How I loved these slices of life!

How I’m honoring this change

My personal “change management” strategy is letter writing. I wrote letters to her while I was pregnant. It’s probably time to write another. I’m not sure how else I might honor the loss of her babyhood. I’d love to hear ideas.

I’m curious, how do you honor transitions as your children grow up? Is there anything you do to celebrate where you’ve been and where you’re going? I’d love to hear. Please post a comment. May our loving energy inspire and lift each other up. go mama!